Neko

saturday

2-10-2024

WARNING! CAR ACCIDENT: god dude. i got into a major car crash thursday. everything is shit right now. i'm physically pretty okay other than a couple gashes in my head and cuts and bruises but if i think about my car for too long i feel nauseous. it's completely totalled and i just feel so shit. my entire body hurts and the doctors found like a nodule or something in my lung so i am having a little bit of trouble breathing. my cds were in my car and i have no idea if they are okay yet. i don't know if i want to even drive again i just keep thinking about the other car slamming into me. there was this one second where i swore i couldn't breathe which i know is just because i got the wind knocked out of me but holy shit. plus i called my fucking mother first and the first thing she said was that it is my fault and that she's angry with me which fucking sucked to hear literally a minute after. then one of my best friends messaged me and all he said was 'was it your fault' and that he was surprised i got medical attention. hi by the way if you're reading this. but god i've been home these past couple days and i really don't want to go back and be stuck.

i don't have much else to say since i have been thinking about this nonstop and writing this makes me feel sick. hopefully my next entry is more upbeat but yeah.

tuesday

2-7-2024

HI!!!!!!!!!!!!!! guess who's back. again. still planning on majoring in film but actually i'm going to have a Second major in french too. my roommate ended up being a narc and fucking annoying but he left so i have the entire room to myself which is awesome. i have a slightly more normal schedule than last semester where i had two days a week where i had three classes; now i have two mon-thurs and one on friday. i completed my required freshman class but i am now in a different one. it seems better since i actually chose the topic. it's about zines and counterculture writing so hopefully it goes well since i enjoy both of these things. yippeeeeeee. i got a helix piercing and a second lobe piercing :]! i have to wait until i get more money for more and a tattoo but i am excited. my friend and my radio show is going well and it's very fun, i choose the music while she chooses the discussion topics.

i am having a nice time so far though sometimes i feel so boreeeedddd. 'recently' i've been partying on fridays and saturdays which has been super fun. i love weed. anywho i will be updating more often probably since i have free time and also a few of my classes are mindnumbingly boring

tuesday

10-3-2023

hello neocities.org. it has been over three months since i have updated and i am back baby! i am officially in college and majoring in film. stuck in the same city unfortunately but at least i live on campus so i am vaguely away. i have three (3) friends yippee they are awesome. i am enjoying my side of the room but my roommate irritates me and i can't tell if i am just prejudiced against cishet white men with blonde hair or if they are valid criticisms. i have one film analysis class that is my favorite class and it is so fun and awesome but i only get to have it twice a week. one of them i am neutral-to-positive about because i get to study bones and murder scenes but it is also far from my dorm and starts at 8:20 in the morning. i dislike my filmmaking class since it is an introduction and i already know this shit i am bored out of my mind.

i Hate my required freshman class basically it teaches you how to articulate empathy and shit and i love the professor she teaches my favorite class too but the PEOPLE. we are reading james baldwin and maxine hong kingston and the people in my class are either white and ignorant or have some sort of weird internalized racism. except for my friends at least they are wonderful. there is one guy (we'll call him "T") and he is literally native american but he was saying that race is self-imposed because people of color generally stick with other people of the same race or at least non-whites. I'M GOING TO EXPLODE HIM WITH MY FUCKING MIND DUDE HE IS SO FUCKING IRRITATING.

anyway i am having a nice time otherwise i have never gotten to see friends everyday outside of school so we are getting close quickly. also every week there is a party on saturdays since my school is a party school, and i have enjoyed the last few since we just got high and chilled it was fun. i am being careful and whatnot i am not an idiot and also i like to have control of what i say and when

we are planning to get tattoos and piercings this winter so that there is no chance of infection through swimming in water or anything which i am ecstatic about, i already have some ideas and whatnot yippeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. also i am drinking my second ever pumpkin spice latte rn and i understand why white girls are obsessed with these it's pretty good.

ALSO i have a radio show with my friend, it is so awesome and cool i love playing music and talking about absolutely nothing it is so fun